Yeah, if there's a way to travel back in time, those two dorks will know how! Well, what about those two college guys next door to me? They're always doing science experiments in their basement.
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Yeah, we just have to find somebody who knows how to do it. Oowuh how are we gonna do that? Does it hurt? I don't wanna do it if it hurts. Hey, that's it! We gotta go back to third grade! Wow! I had already forgotten how great third grade was. There's not a thing in this life that I wouldn't trade just to go back, for one minute
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We had warm cookies and hearts full of loveĪnd there wasn't a care in the world of me. We would make sparkly pictures with glitter and glue In the Third Grade we used to write with crayons Sat on marshmallow desks with teddy-bear smiles We learned wondrous things from a teacher so nice
We used to laugh and play and cherish each day in the Third Grade Remember how it used to be in the Third Grade? And now that it's all over, we're starting to see just how special it was. Only now do we realize how much we all took the third grade for granted.Įverything was great in third grade. I just didn't think it would come so soon. This is the loss of that playful youth all our parents warned us about. I can't take it, man! Writing in cursive? Fractions? I can't do i-it! The bell rings, and the students head out onto the playground.Īnd did you see her lazy eye? You can't even tell what she's looking at. Now, get back to your desk and write a thousand-word essay on why you feel you need to disrupt my class.
This is the fourth grade! You need to grow up! Well, young man, I hope you have a good explanation for this. Play time is over, children! Do you understand me?! I don't know how your last teacher behaved, but this is the fourth grade! And it is time to go to work! Everything is written in some strange, foreign language. Hey, what the hell is with these little half-desks?ĭude, look at the walls. An aquarium and some modern art are also present. The bell rings again, and the kids enter their new classroom a bit awed at the surroundings.
Hey, Timmy might need some help pulling his pants down. When the clock hits 8:35 we all stand up on our desks, pull down our pants and yell, "KISS MY ASS!!!" Uh-uh, maybe we could stand like this, with our wieners pokin' through the back of our legs, you know, and give 'er a nice fruit bowl. I think showing her our asses should be quite sufficient, Butters. Well, buh wuh when we pull our pants down, should we stand frontways or back? I mean, do we show 'er our. ah, how about right at 8:35 we all jump up on our desks and pull down our pants and shout, "KISS MY ASS!!!" all together! Hey, listen up everybody! We need to stand up to this new teacher and insert ourselves! Let's all do something radical! We have to take a hard stance right now and establish that we're the dominant ones in this relationship! Īlright. You know, I heard our fourth-grade teacher is some new lady from Denver. Yeah, but now, we're fifth-graders, you stupid fourth-graders, so move it! ĭude, we gotta find some third-graders to beat up. No more getting pushed around by fourth graders! Well, here we are, dude, the first day of fourth grade. The camera pans to the right to show the four boys standing before their new classroom: FOURTH GRADE. A "WELCOME BACK!" sign hangs over a row of student lockers as kids mill around in the hall. The official script for " Fourth Grade" was released by South Park Studios.
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